Non-buyer's remorse

It's getting ridiculous how many times I've ummed and ahded over an item in the new AW/10 collections until it's sold out in my size.
There are dozens of examples on Topshop.com alone. Here's my top three...

(The latter in grey)
And these babies are currently in the 'new in' section, but sold out when you click through - what's that all about? They can't have sold out already? An online error perhaps? I need them!

So, in recent weeks, I've been proactive in my purchasing, and it's kind of paid off. You see, I was so sick of what I call non-buyers' remorse, that feeling when something you wanted sells out, I ordered two major items from ASOS on a total whim.

(the latter in black - damn my tardy picture research.)
So, I immediately started hyperventilating after dropping 200 notes on these babies in a lunch hour (so much I qualified for free NEXT DAY DELIVERY - that's when you know you've gone a click too far) and experienced how non-buyers' remorse becomes buyers' remorse.

But I was desperate to try on both. I was sure they'd transform my AW look instantly, and make me the proudest peacock in London. When they were delivered to work I immediately ripped open the bag and ran to the toilets and its full length mirror to see the new me...

But they both looked shades of shit. The beautiful cape transformed me into nothing more than an Inspector Sherlock wannabe. The butter-soft and now sold-out aviator jacked was too short for my damn long body and too slim for my gigantic boobage. I was devastated. But there was a glimmer of smugness. At least I'd tried. At least I know it wasn't to be. And when I drop by ASOS and see them, I don't wonder what could have been, but know neither item was ever destined to be worn by me.

So, what's the moral of this long-winded tale? If you really want something you probably shouldn't buy, try it anyway. If you're anything like me, the dream of that illusive item is bigger than the reality, and you'll be left with the money refunded back in the bank, knowing you didn't let that perfect item get away.